Jake and Mary Jacobs marked their 70th anniversary of a happy marriage last year, but their journey wasn’t simple.
Mary, who is White, and Jake, who is Black, lived in the same city in 1940s Britain. At that time, there weren’t many Black men there.
Even though Mary’s father told her to leave, Mary chose love over easy choices.
“When I told my father I was going to marry Jake, he said, ‘If you marry that man, you will never set foot in this house again.’”
Mary and Jake first met at a technical college where Mary was learning typing and shorthand, and Jake was undergoing Air Force training. They met during the war when Jake moved from Trinidad to Britain.
Jake impressed Mary with his understanding of Shakespeare, and they got to know each other. One day, they invited Mary and her friend to join them for a picnic. Unfortunately, someone passing by saw them and reported Mary to her father. The woman was shocked to see two English girls talking with black guys. After this incident, Mary wasn’t allowed to visit her father again.
After Jake returned to Trinidad, they kept in touch through letters. A few years later, he came back to the U.K. to find a better-paying job.
Jake surprised Mary by proposing, and she, at 19, said yes. However, when she told her family, they kicked her out.
“I left with only one small suitcase. No family came to our registry office wedding in 1948.”
Mary’s father was upset about her marrying a black man, and Mary didn’t realize that society felt the same way.
The early years of their marriage in Birmingham were tough. Mary cried every day, hardly ate, and they faced many challenges. Nobody would talk to them, they couldn’t find a place to live because nobody would rent to a black man, and they had little money.
Even walking down the street together was hard because people would point at them, Mary explained.
Mary and Jake were excited to become parents, but at eight months, Mary gave birth to a stillborn child. She mentioned it wasn’t due to the stress she was under, but it deeply saddened them, and they didn’t have any more children.
As time passed, their lives improved. Mary became a teacher and eventually an assistant principal, while Jake found a job with the Post Office. They made new friends, but Mary felt the need to explain to people that her husband was black before introducing them.
“My father passed away when I was 30, and even though we reconciled by then, he never approved of Jake,” she shared.
Currently, Jake, 89, and Mary, 84, live in Solihull, a town south of Birmingham. They recently celebrated 70 years of marriage.
Jake said he has no regrets, but he also mentioned that today’s black youth may not fully understand the challenges he faced in 1940s Britain.
“When I arrived in the U.K., I faced abuse every day. Once, on a bus, a man rubbed his hands on my neck and said, ‘I wanted to see if the dirt would come off.’ Back then, working in an office as a black man with white girls wasn’t considered safe,” Jake explained.
Despite all the challenges, bias, and abuse, the pair is still deeply in love and has no regrets about being married. They have been happily married for more than 70 years.
These two are a true inspiration, and I wish them a lifetime of pleasure because of the love they have for one another.
Vince Gill – Ain’t It Always That Way
“Ain’t It Always That Way” by Vince Gill is one of those songs that, rather than coming at you with a great boom, enters your heart slowly and stays there long after the last note dies. If you’ve ever thought back on the little ironies in life or the bittersweet quality of love, this song will seem like an old friend who really knows it.
Vince Gill’s gentle, honeyed voice carries us through the well-known highs and lows of life and love. This song is dedicated to all those who have had to confront the bittersweet reality that hopes and plans don’t always turn out the way they had hoped. But isn’t that simply the way life is?
With a genuine and moving performance, Gill expertly captures the complex facets of life’s unpredictable nature. The song seems to be a meditation on those moments when you realize that, believe it or not, the cosmos sometimes arranges things in a humorous way. This song finds its voice during those melancholy, dejected moments when you can’t help but laugh at how ridiculous everything is.
A simple yet heartfelt melody surrounds the lyrics, making it feel warm and inviting on a cold night. Because of the acoustic arrangement and Gill’s sympathetic performance, which seems like he’s speaking to you, the song feels more private and intimate.
What makes “Ain’t It Always That Way” unique is how relatable it is. Everyone has gone through moments in life when something we took for granted slips through their fingers and surprises us. But there’s a certain beauty to that unpredictable quality—a reminder that life is a journey with lots of twists and turns, and that’s okay. Rather than dwell in sorrow, the song subtly suggests the tenacity we all possess, even in the face of misfortune.
In the end, this song is a reminder that, in spite of all of its imperfections and surprises, each minute of life is precious. “Isn’t It Always That Way” offers comfort on the journey, regardless of whether you’re reflecting on missed opportunities, heartbroken relationships, or life’s inequalities.
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