The debate over peeing in the shower continues, with many advocating for the practice due to its water-saving benefits. However, Dr. Alicia Jeffrey-Thomas, a pelvic health specialist, warns that for those assigned female at birth, this habit could have unintended health consequences.
The Water Conservation Argument

One of the strongest arguments for urinating in the shower is its potential to save water. By eliminating the need for a separate toilet flush, a person could save approximately 2,190 liters (579 gallons) of water per year. If the entire U.S. population adopted this practice, it could lead to an annual water savings of 699 billion liters (185 billion gallons). This significant reduction in water consumption highlights the environmental advantages of shower urination.
Potential Health Risks: The Pelvic Floor Connection
Despite the environmental benefits, the potential health consequences of this habit must be considered. Dr. Jeffrey-Thomas explains in a TikTok video that regularly peeing in the shower may lead to pelvic floor and bladder control issues.
The Pavlovian Response
Dr. Jeffrey-Thomas likens this habit to Pavlov’s classical conditioning experiment, where dogs learned to associate the sound of a bell with food. Similarly, repeatedly urinating in the shower can train the brain to link the sound of running water with the urge to pee. This association may result in involuntary urination triggered by running water sounds, such as a faucet, toilet flush, or even rain.

Pelvic Floor Dysfunction Risks
For individuals with existing pelvic floor dysfunction, this learned association can exacerbate bladder control problems. Dr. Jeffrey-Thomas explains that urinating while standing in the shower does not allow the pelvic floor muscles to fully relax, potentially leading to incomplete bladder emptying. Over time, this can contribute to urinary retention and increase the risk of urinary tract infections (UTIs).
Some argue that squatting while urinating in the shower might alleviate pelvic floor strain. Dr. Jeffrey-Thomas acknowledges that a full squat position allows for better pelvic floor relaxation, but she still advises against making shower urination a habit. If one must urinate in the shower, a proper squatting position is preferable to standing.
Why Doesn’t Toilet Flushing Trigger the Same Response?

A common question is why flushing the toilet doesn’t condition the brain in the same way. Dr. Jeffrey-Thomas clarifies that by the time a person flushes the toilet, they have already urinated, so no association is formed. However, individuals who struggle to resist the urge to urinate when exposed to running water may already have underlying bladder control issues.
Understanding Pelvic Floor Dysfunction

Pelvic floor dysfunction is a common condition, particularly among women. The pelvic floor is a group of muscles that support the bladder, uterus, rectum, and other organs. Dysfunction occurs when these muscles become too weak or too tight, leading to symptoms such as:
- Urinary and bowel incontinence
- Lower back pain
- Pain during intercourse
- Increased urgency or frequency of urination

Factors such as childbirth, surgery, aging, obesity, and high-impact activities can contribute to pelvic floor dysfunction. Given that urinating in the shower might worsen symptoms, individuals should be aware of these risks before adopting the habit.
The Biological Factor: Why Female Anatomy Matters
Dr. Jeffrey-Thomas emphasizes that those with female anatomy are not designed to urinate while standing. Unlike male anatomy, where the positioning allows for better bladder emptying while standing, females may struggle to fully relax the pelvic floor in this position. This can lead to incomplete bladder emptying, increasing the risk of UTIs and other urinary complications.
Pros and Cons of Peeing in the Shower

Pros:
- Water conservation: Reduces toilet water usage significantly.
- Convenience: Saves time, particularly during a rushed morning routine.

Cons:
- Pelvic floor health risks: May contribute to bladder control issues and pelvic dysfunction.
- Conditioned response: Can create an involuntary urge to urinate when exposed to running water.
- Sanitation concerns: While urine is mostly sterile, it can still contain bacteria that may pose hygiene risks.

The Bottom Line
While peeing in the shower may seem like an eco-friendly and convenient habit, it is important to weigh the potential health risks. Dr. Alicia Jeffrey-Thomas’s insights serve as a reminder to consider the long-term effects of our daily routines. Striving for sustainability should not come at the cost of personal health. Ultimately, making an informed decision based on both environmental and health factors is key to maintaining overall well-being.
My Wife Disappeared 15 Years Ago After Going Out to Buy Diapers – I Saw Her Last Week and She Said, ‘You Have to Forgive Me’

Fifteen years ago, my wife, Lisa, kissed our newborn son and left to buy diapers. But she never returned. Last week, I saw her alive and well in a supermarket. What happened next was something I’ll never forget.
I had spent the past 15 years searching for closure, raising my son Noah, and trying to make sense of Lisa’s disappearance. But nothing prepared me for the moment I saw her again.

A man standing in a supermarket | Source: Midjourney
At first, I thought I was dreaming. But after observing for a few minutes, I knew it was her. She was older and looked different, but her gestures were still the same.
Before I share what happened next, let me take you back to when she suddenly disappeared.
It’s hard to describe what it feels like to lose someone without an explanation. One moment, they’re part of your life, and the next, they’re just gone.

An upset man sitting on a bench | Source: Pexels
Fifteen years ago, Lisa kissed our newborn son, Noah, on the forehead, grabbed her purse, and told me she was heading out to buy diapers. She didn’t take her phone. She didn’t leave a note. She just vanished.
At first, I thought maybe something she got into an accident. I drove toward the supermarket and looked for her on my way. I even checked the dark alleys, but no sign of her.
When I couldn’t find anything, I called the police.

A police car at night | Source: Pexels
I was hopeful when they began their investigation, but those feelings were replaced by sadness when the police told me there were no leads.
Her phone was off, and her bank accounts were untouched.
Eventually, the police stopped investigating, concluding she might have run away or met with some tragic fate.
They even suggested I move on, but how could I?
Lisa wasn’t just my wife. She was my best friend. I couldn’t reconcile the loving woman I knew with someone who would abandon her family.

A couple sitting together | Source: Pexels
As a result, I cycled through every possibility. Maybe she was in trouble and couldn’t come back. Maybe she had run off with someone else.
But none of it made sense.
For years, I lived in a fog of anger and grief. I’d stay up at night, wondering where she was and why she left. Did she think I wasn’t good enough? Did she think Noah and I weren’t worth staying for?
On bad nights, I convinced myself she had died, and on worse nights, I hated her for leaving.

A man standing near a window | Source: Midjourney
But life doesn’t stop because you’re heartbroken, does it?
Back then, Noah needed me, and I had to pull myself together for his sake. It was difficult, but with my mother’s support, I learned how to change diapers and feed my baby. I even found the right way to make him burp.
As he grew up, I became a pro at packing lunches and was always there to help with homework. I became a father and a mother to him, balancing a full-time job with the demands of raising a child.

A boy eating food | Source: Pexels
Now, Noah is 15, tall, and lanky with a crooked grin that reminds me so much of Lisa. He’s the light of my life and the reason I keep going, even on days when I miss Lisa the most.
There were times when I imagined her walking back through the door, apologizing to me for being so late. It took me years to accept that my wife was never coming back. She was either dead or gone forever.
But that all changed when I saw her in the supermarket last week.

A close-up shot of a woman in a supermarket | Source: Midjourney
I was in the frozen food aisle, deciding between two brands of waffles, when I saw her. At first, I thought my eyes were playing tricks on me.
The woman scanning a bag of frozen peas down the aisle looked exactly like Lisa. But that was impossible… wasn’t it?
I froze, staring at her like I’d just seen a ghost.

A man in a supermarket | Source: Midjourney
Her hair was shorter, and a few strands of gray framed her face, but it was her. The way she stood and tilted her head to read the label was so familiar.
My heart skipped a beat as I realized what was happening.
Could it really be Lisa?
I doubted myself at first. Maybe I wanted to see her so badly that my mind was playing cruel tricks on me.

A man standing in a supermarket, looking straight ahead | Source: Midjourney
So, I pushed my cart further down the aisle to get a closer look. That’s when she turned slightly and I saw her face fully.
It was her, and there was no mistaking it now.
I quickly abandoned my cart and walked toward her. I stood behind her and took a deep breath.
“Lisa?” I called out her name for the first time in years.
She paused for a moment and then turned around. At first, she just stared at me. Then, as recognition set in, her eyes widened in shock.

A woman looking at a man | Source: Midjourney
“Bryan?” she whispered.
I couldn’t believe it was her.
After all these years, she was alive, standing right in front of me as if she’d never left. My mind raced with questions as I looked at her from head to toe.
“Lisa, what’s going on?” I finally managed to speak. “Why are you here? Where have you been all this time?”
Her lips parted as if she was about to say something, but she hesitated. She glanced around the aisle, clearly nervous.
“Bryan… I can explain,” she began. “But first, you have to forgive me.”

A worried woman talking to a man | Source: Midjourney
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. Forgive her? For disappearing without a trace? For leaving me to raise our son alone?
“Forgive you?” I repeated. “Lisa, do you even realize what you’re asking? Do you know what these last 15 years have been like for me? For Noah?”
She looked down at the floor, avoiding my gaze. “I know. I know I hurt you both. But please, let me explain.”
“Explain,” I said sharply. “Now.”

A man talking to a woman | Source: Midjourney
She took a deep breath and looked around nervously. “Not here,” she said softly, gesturing toward the front of the store. “Follow me.”
She led me to the parking lot, where a sleek black SUV was parked. It looked expensive, a far cry from the modest life we once shared.
Once we reached her car, she turned to face me, her eyes glistening with tears.
“I didn’t mean to hurt you,” she began. “I… I just couldn’t handle it.”

A woman explaining herself | Source: Midjourney
“Handle what?” I snapped, my patience wearing thin. “Being a mother? Being a wife? Living the life we built together?”
“It wasn’t you, Bryan,” she cried. “It was me. I was scared. Scared of being a mother, of living paycheck to paycheck, of never giving Noah the life he deserved. I felt like I was drowning.”
“So, you thought the best solution was to abandon us?” I asked, my voice rising. “Do you have any idea what you put us through?”
Tears streamed down her face as she nodded.
“I know, and I hate myself for it. I thought I was doing the right thing. I told myself I’d come back when I had something to give.”

A woman standing in a parking lot | Source: Midjourney
“Where were you all these years?” I asked.
“I went to Europe,” she replied, unable to meet my gaze. “My parents helped me get away. They didn’t tell you because they thought you were holding me back. They never approved of our marriage. They didn’t like you.”
That’s when I started connecting the dots. Her parents barely helped me look after Noah after she left. They didn’t even keep in touch for long.

A man holding a baby | Source: Pexels
“I changed my name, went back to school, and built a career,” she continued, her voice shaking. “I’m a business consultant now, and I returned to this town because I wanted to see you and Noah. I had no idea I’d bump into you at the supermarket. I—”
“You wanted to see us?” I repeated. “Really, Lisa? You think you can fix everything by returning to our lives?”
“I have the money Noah needs to live a fulfilled life, Bryan. I’ve got enough to give him everything he deserves.”

A woman looking at a man in a parking lot | Source: Midjourney
I couldn’t believe it. I couldn’t believe Lisa thought she could just waltz back into our lives with a bag of cash and a guilty conscience.
“You thought your money would fix everything?” I asked.
“No, I didn’t think it would fix everything, but I had to try. Please, Bryan. At least let me see Noah.”
“No,” I said firmly, stepping back. “You don’t get to disrupt his life after 15 years. You don’t get to rewrite the past because you finally decided to grow a conscience.”

A man in a parking lot | Source: Midjourney
Her tears fell freely now, but I didn’t care. All I could think about were the nights I stayed up with a crying baby, the years I struggled to make ends meet, and the countless times Noah asked why his mother wasn’t there.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered, her voice breaking. “I didn’t know what else to do.”
“Well, I do,” I said, my voice cold. “Noah and I have moved on. We don’t need you anymore, Lisa.”
Without another word, I turned and walked away.

A man walking away | Source: Midjourney
She kept begging me to stop, but I was done. I couldn’t let her enter our lives and destroy everything.
Do you think I did the right thing? What would you have done if you were in my place?
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