I was shocked when my husband, Jake, handed me a schedule to help me “become a better wife.” But instead of losing my temper, I decided to play along. Little did Jake know, I was about to teach him a lesson that would make him rethink his new idea of marriage.
I’ve always been the calm and reasonable one in our relationship. Jake, on the other hand, can easily get caught up in new trends or ideas, whether it’s a hobby or a YouTube video that claims to change his life in just a few easy steps.
Jake and I were fine until he met Steve. Steve was the type of guy who thought being loud made him right. He’d talk over anyone who tried to correct him. He was also always single (no surprise there), but that didn’t stop him from giving relationship advice to all his married friends, including Jake. Jake, who should’ve known better, was impressed by Steve’s confidence.
I didn’t worry about it much at first, but then Jake started saying things like, “Steve says marriages work best when the wife handles the household,” or “Steve thinks women should always look good for their husbands, no matter how long they’ve been married.” I’d roll my eyes and make sarcastic comments, but it was bothering me. Jake was changing. He’d raise an eyebrow if I ordered takeout instead of cooking, and he’d sigh if I let the laundry pile up—forgetting that I also had a full-time job.
Then one night, it happened. Jake came home with The List.
He sat me down, unfolded a piece of paper, and slid it across the table. “I’ve been thinking,” he began, sounding condescending in a way I’d never heard before. “You’re a great wife, Lisa, but there’s room for improvement.”
My eyebrows shot up. “Oh really?”
He nodded, not realizing he was walking into dangerous territory. “Yeah, Steve helped me realize that our marriage could be even better if you, you know, stepped up a bit.”
I looked at the paper in front of me. It was a schedule, titled “Lisa’s Weekly Routine for Becoming a Better Wife.” Jake had actually written out a plan for me based on what Steve—a single guy with no relationship experience—thought I should do to “improve” as a wife.
I was supposed to wake up at 5 a.m. every day to make Jake a gourmet breakfast, then go to the gym to “stay in shape.” After that? Cleaning, laundry, ironing—all before heading to work. Every evening, I was to cook dinner from scratch and make snacks for Jake and his friends when they came over. It was sexist and insulting on so many levels, I didn’t know where to start. I just stared at Jake, wondering if he had lost his mind.
“This will be great for you, and us,” he continued, unaware.
“Steve says it’s important to have structure, and I think you could benefit from—”
“Benefit from what?” I interrupted, keeping my voice calm. Jake blinked, surprised, but quickly recovered.
“Well, from having some guidance and a schedule.”
I wanted to throw the paper in his face, but instead, I surprised myself—I smiled.
“You’re right, Jake,” I said sweetly. “I’m lucky you made me this schedule. I’ll start tomorrow.”
He looked relieved, and I almost felt sorry for him as I stuck the list on the fridge. Almost. He had no idea what was coming.
The next day, I looked at the ridiculous schedule and smiled. If Jake thought he could hand me a list of “improvements,” he was about to learn a lesson. I opened my laptop and started a new document titled, “Jake’s Plan for Becoming the Best Husband Ever.” If he wanted perfection from me, there was a cost.
I started by listing all the things he’d suggested for me, beginning with the gym. “$1,200 for a personal trainer,” I typed, barely holding back a laugh.
Next was the food. If Jake wanted gourmet meals, that wasn’t happening with our current grocery budget. Organic, non-GMO, free-range everything? That wasn’t cheap. “$700 per month for groceries,” I wrote. And if he wanted fancy meals, he’d need cooking lessons too—those were expensive.
I leaned back, laughing as I imagined his face when he saw this. But I wasn’t done. The best part was yet to come.
There was no way I could manage all these demands and keep my job. If Jake wanted me to follow his absurd schedule full-time, he’d have to cover my lost income. I calculated my salary and added it to the list. “$75,000 per year to replace Lisa’s salary since she will now be your full-time maid, chef, and personal assistant.”
By now, I was laughing so hard my stomach hurt.
And just for fun, I added a note about expanding the house. If Jake was going to have friends over all the time, they’d need a separate space. “$50,000 to build a man cave so Jake and his friends don’t disrupt Lisa’s new routine.”
I printed out the list, set it on the kitchen counter, and waited for Jake to come home. When he arrived, he was in a good mood.
“Hey, babe,” he called, spotting the paper. “What’s this?”
Keeping a straight face, I said, “Oh, just a little list to help you become the best husband ever.”
He chuckled, thinking I was playing along, but as he read the list, his smile faded. “$1,200 for a trainer? $700 a month for groceries? What the hell, Lisa?”
I crossed my arms. “Well, you want me to follow your plan, right? I figured we should budget for it.”
His face turned pale as he flipped through the pages. “$75,000 a year? You’re quitting your job?”
“How else can I follow your plan?” I asked. “I can’t work and be the perfect wife, right?”
Jake looked stunned. The numbers and the absurdity of his demands hit him all at once. His smugness disappeared, replaced by the realization that he had messed up.
“I didn’t mean for it to be like this,” he stammered. “I just thought—”
“You thought you could ‘fix’ me like a project?” I said, my voice calm but firm. “Jake, marriage is about respect. And if you ever try to ‘fix’ me like this again, it’ll cost you a lot more than what’s on that paper.”
There was a long silence. Jake sighed and looked at me, defeated.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I didn’t realize how ridiculous it was. Steve made it sound reasonable, but now I see… it’s toxic. I’ve been such a fool.”
I nodded. “Yes, you have. And honestly, Steve has no idea what he’s talking about. Why would you listen to him?”
Jake’s face softened as the truth hit him. “You’re right. He has no clue.”
We tore up both lists, and for the first time in weeks, I felt like we were back on the same team. It was a reminder that marriage isn’t about being perfect—it’s about being better together.
20+ People Honestly Showed What Their Jobs Are Really Like
It’s impossible to argue with the fact that all jobs are important. We see people specialize in different things every day. They could be doctors, school teachers, cashiers, or cleaners. All jobs contain things that outsiders have no idea about.
We at Bright Side have found Internet users of different professions that revealed the invisible side of their jobs. And in the bonus section, you’ll find a tweet about the difficulties that shop assistants have to deal with.
“My sister works in a photo center and this is who she was asked to take a picture of.”
This is the hand of a doctor after removing his medical gloves after 10 hours of being on the clock.
“A group of teenagers came in just to trash the theater. I was one of the people that had to clean it.”
“I work in the Arctic and Antarctic and find it much more convenient to wear my watch on a lanyard than on my wrist because of all of the layers I wear.”
“This watch has been to Antarctica countless times and to the geographic North Pole 12 times.”
“Be nice to your trash man when it’s raining and it’s 30 degrees outside. We’re not invincible. This is my hand after working 4 hours in bad weather.”
“I work at a hotel these days and went to see if a room was mislabeled as dirty. This is what I found.”
“I kept my hotel key cards from my first year working for the airlines.”
“Working hard as a truck driver has its advantages: the views!”
“My mom works at Amazon and she sent me a photo of one of the trucks she loaded.”
“I work at a call center. Whenever I get a particularly rude caller, I like to draw what they might look like. Here’s Lorraine from today.”
“I work in a fast-food restaurant, and this is our broom. My boss says it’s too expensive to replace it, yet he drives a Lincoln.”
“I work in the film industry and I’m usually too shy to ask for a picture with an actor, but I had to get one with this little guy.”
“Every staple I removed in one year at my boring office job”
“I work in a −25°F freezer every day.”
“I work at a cat shelter. These are the ’can we keep him?’ photos I sent to my partner. It worked.”
“My job involves putting labels on boxes. I hold them with my left hand and put them on the box with my right. This is what my ’clean’ hands look like.”
“I got transferred to a new location at work. This is my new break ’room.’”
You can work anywhere if you’re a programmer.
“I work as a professional princess on weekends. My kitty insists on inspecting each costume for detail accuracy.”
“I work at a hotel — a guest left this when they checked out.”
This is a bathtub full of playing cards.
“So, I work in a movie theater. ’Family of the Year’ award goes to these guys!”
“I’m a seaman. We live alone in these rooms. Depending on your position, the room can be better and bigger. This is mine.”
“I have my own toilet and shower.”
“Took this photo yesterday at work. Thought I’d share it with you guys.”
What is your job and what downsides are there to it?
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