My adopted children got a letter from their birth mother the day before my 86th birthday. Instead of celebrating with me, they decided to meet her. What they learned was shocking and changed everything.
“Mom, I know you and Dad gave us so much love, but I can’t lie. I’m curious about this woman,” my daughter Emily said over the phone. I thought she was calling to confirm plans for my birthday, but she had something serious to tell me. I didn’t realize how much I wasn’t ready for it.
Many years ago, my husband Kevin and I wanted children, but after trying for so long, nothing happened. It broke my heart, especially since I felt like I wasn’t enough. Kevin also had fertility issues, but I couldn’t stop worrying about it.
When we were almost 40, we applied to adopt, and a pregnant teenager chose us. We were so happy! We were open to letting her stay involved, but she preferred a closed adoption. We respected her wishes.
Soon after, we discovered she was having twins—a boy and a girl! Without hesitation, we adopted them both, named them Emily and Ethan, and gave them all the love we could.
We were in our 40s, financially secure, and ran a business that gave us plenty of time to spend with our kids. It was challenging at times, but we wouldn’t change anything.
Kevin and I adored watching our babies sleep, and Kevin would often say, “This was the best decision we ever made.” I would smile back, my heart full of love.
Emily grew up loving sports, especially basketball, and earned a scholarship to UCLA. Ethan, on the other hand, was brilliant, excelling in school and math. He got into Stanford, and although it was hard to see him go, we were so proud.
Life went on, and they got married and had children of their own. But when Kevin passed away when we were 80, I was devastated. Luckily, Emily and her husband Richard, and Ethan and his wife Susan, supported me through it all.
One day, Emily told me, “Mom, we’ll always be here for you. I want my kids to have a happy grandma who bakes cookies!” That made me smile through my grief.
But then Emily’s phone call changed everything.
“But honey, it’s my birthday tomorrow,” I said, surprised that Emily and Ethan weren’t coming. My health hadn’t been great, and I was hoping to see my family. Emily’s silence told me something was wrong.
“Mom, we got a letter from a woman claiming to be our birth mother,” Emily revealed. She wanted to meet us tomorrow. I was shocked.
The adoption had been closed, so this was completely unexpected. Emily sounded upset, and I wasn’t sure if it was because of me or the situation.
“I didn’t think it mattered,” I tried to explain, my voice trembling. “I can tell you everything now. But why on my birthday?”
“Mom, she doesn’t live in Pasadena anymore, and Ethan and I are mad you didn’t tell us. We need time to think.”
My heart sank. “Please come over tonight, and we can talk it out.” But Emily needed time. She promised to call later, but her voice was choked with emotion. I could hear her crying.
The next day was my birthday, but I didn’t hear from my kids. It was heartbreaking. Friends and cousins sent birthday greetings, but nothing from Emily or Ethan.
I wondered if they had already met their birth mother. I felt abandoned and unsure if they were angry with me.
Just as I was about to go to bed, the doorbell rang.
“HAPPY BIRTHDAY!” my family shouted. Emily and Ethan stood at the door with a cake. I couldn’t believe it. They had come after all!
We hugged, and tears filled my eyes. I was so relieved and happy. We celebrated together, and the kids brought food, gifts, and joy to my home. But Emily pulled me aside to talk privately.
“Mom, you don’t have to apologize for anything,” she told me. Ethan agreed, explaining that they felt conflicted and needed time to process everything. I was grateful for their words, but I had to ask about their birth mother.
Emily sighed and told me, “It didn’t go well. We don’t trust her.”
“Why not?” I asked.
“She talked about herself for hours,” Emily explained. “She didn’t seem interested in getting to know us, just her accomplishments.”
Ethan added, “And then she told us she’s sick, and it seemed like she just wanted something from us.”
They didn’t feel like she had been looking for them for years as she claimed. It was all about what she needed from them.
“I don’t think I want to talk to her again,” Ethan said.
Emily, however, was conflicted. But then she looked at me and said, “You’re my mom. You’ve always been my only mom.”
Tears filled my eyes again, and we hugged. Even Ethan, who was usually so serious, was emotional.
“A mother is the one who raises you, not the one who gives birth to you,” Ethan added.
At that moment, I knew that everything would be alright. Their love for me was strong, and I was still their mom.
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Emily’s words warmed my heart like nothing else could. “You’re my mom. You’ve always been my only mom.” For a moment, time stood still, and all the confusion and fear I had been carrying dissolved into the embrace of my children. I held them close, their warmth reminding me of all the years we had shared, all the laughter, all the tears. Nothing could erase that.
As we stood there, huddled together, I realized that this was the moment I had feared for so long. When they were children, I had often wondered whether there would come a day when they’d want to seek out their birth mother, and how that would affect our relationship. But here we were, and they were still mine.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier,” I said softly, brushing the tears from my cheeks. “I just never wanted you to feel different or unloved. I wanted you to know that you were my children, no matter what.”
Ethan, ever the logical one, squeezed my hand. “Mom, we know that now. It was confusing at first, but the more we thought about it, the more we realized that nothing could change the bond we have with you.”
Emily nodded, wiping her eyes. “Yeah, and meeting Amanda—it put things into perspective. She may have given birth to us, but she wasn’t there for the scraped knees, the late-night talks, or the big moments in our lives. You were. You are our mother.”
I looked at both of them, their grown faces reflecting the same expressions I had seen since they were children—so much love, even when they were upset or unsure. They were the best parts of me and Kevin, the family we had built together.
“You know,” I began, trying to gather my thoughts. “There was a time when I worried about what would happen if you ever found out. I wondered if it would change how you saw me. But now I see that it didn’t matter. You’ve always been mine, and I’ve always been yours.”
Emily wrapped her arms around me again. “It didn’t change anything. If anything, it just made us appreciate you more. You didn’t have to take us in, but you did, and you gave us the best life. That means more than anything.”
“I’m just sorry you had to go through all this on your birthday,” Ethan added, looking apologetic. “We didn’t mean to hurt you, Mom. We just needed to figure things out.”
I smiled softly, shaking my head. “You did what you needed to do. I understand. And honestly, the fact that you’re here now—well, it’s the best birthday gift I could’ve ever asked for.”
We stood there for a few more moments, just holding on to each other, before Emily spoke again. “There’s something else,” she said, her voice tentative.
I looked at her, unsure of what else could come after everything that had happened. “What is it, honey?”
“We talked about it, Ethan and I, and… we don’t think we’re going to have any more contact with Amanda,” she admitted. “After everything she said, we realized that her motives weren’t pure. She didn’t reach out because she wanted to be part of our lives. She just wanted something from us.”
Ethan nodded in agreement. “It felt more like a transaction to her. She barely asked about us, Mom. It was all about her. We left that meeting feeling used, not reunited.”
My heart ached for them. I had worried that meeting Amanda would cause them pain, and it had. “I’m so sorry you had to go through that,” I said, pulling them close again. “You deserved better.”
“We have better,” Emily replied, her voice filled with conviction. “We have you.”
I smiled, but there was still something bothering me. “I don’t want to tell you what to do, but… if you ever want to know more about your birth mother, or if you change your mind and want to explore that relationship, I won’t hold it against you. You deserve to know your full story, whatever that means.”
Emily and Ethan exchanged a glance before Ethan spoke up. “We’ve talked about that too, and maybe someday we’ll want to know more. But right now, we’re happy with the life we’ve built—with you. We’re not ready to bring Amanda into our lives, especially after everything that happened.”
Emily added, “We realized something important after meeting her: family isn’t just about blood. It’s about love and the time you spend together. And you gave us everything we needed. You are our family.”
I couldn’t hold back my tears any longer. Hearing them say those words—words I had hoped for but never expected to hear—was the greatest gift I could have received. They didn’t need to choose between me and Amanda. In their hearts, I had always been their mother, and nothing could change that.
“Thank you,” I whispered, my voice shaky with emotion. “Thank you for coming back to me.”
“We never left, Mom,” Ethan said, smiling gently. “We were just a little lost for a minute.”
As the night wore on, we joined the rest of the family. The grandkids were laughing and playing, the house was filled with warmth and love, and for the first time in days, I felt truly at peace. We ate, we laughed, and I opened the thoughtful gifts they had brought. But the real gift was their presence, their love, and the reassurance that we were still the close-knit family we had always been.
At one point, Emily caught my eye from across the room and smiled. “Happy birthday, Mom,” she mouthed, and I smiled back, my heart swelling with gratitude.
As I sat in my living room that night, surrounded by my family, I realized that no matter what happened in the future, this moment was everything. My children knew who their real mother was, and I knew that I had done my best by them. There were no more secrets, no more worries about what could be. Just the knowledge that love—real, unconditional love—was what held us all together.
And as I blew out my birthday candles, I made a wish. Not for anything new or different, but for more moments like this. Moments filled with love, laughter, and the joy of being together. Because in the end, that’s all that truly mattered.
He was the first man in the world to give birth – 16 years later, he looks like this
In a groundbreaking moment 16 years ago, Thomas Beatie etched his name in history as the world’s first man to undergo pregnancy.
Born female, Thomas underwent a gender transition, now identifying as a transgender man. The global spotlight shone on him when news broke of his remarkable journey to parenthood with the birth of his first daughter, Susan
In a surprising turn of events in 2006, he halted his testosterone treatment with the aspiration of conceiving. Facing fertility challenges with his then-wife Nancy, Thomas made the courageous decision to carry the child himself.
The iconic image of Thomas Beatie sporting a heavily pregnant belly first circulated in 2008, creating ripples across the world. Media dubbed Beatie “the pregnant man” and news of his story quickly spread worldwide.
Yet, the journey was far from smooth, with hate emails and death threats pouring in from numerous quarters, including established media outlets.
”Doctors have discriminated against us, turning us away due to their religious beliefs. Health care professionals have refused to call me by a male pronoun or recognize Nancy as my wife. Receptionists have laughed at us. Friends and family have been unsupportive; most of Nancy’s family doesn’t even know I’m transgender,” Thomas later said.
During an extensive 48-hour labor, Susan, the first child of Thomas and Nancy, was born into the world healthy and happy. Thomas, determined to opt for a natural birth, defied expectations. His case marked the first documented instance where a legally recognized male gave birth within a marital union with a woman.
Thomas Thomas Trace Beatie
Posted by Thomas Trace Beatie on Tuesday, February 23, 2016
Over the course of five years without testosterone, Thomas experienced four more pregnancies (one of which resulted in an ectopic pregnancy). Together with his first wife, Nancy, he raised Susan and sons Austin and Jensen, presenting themselves as a traditional family with strong values.
In a significant television debut, Thomas Beatie took center stage with an exclusive hour-long interview on the Oprah Winfrey Show in April 2008. Addressing a global audience, he openly discussed his belief in the reproductive right to bear a child, irrespective of his male gender identity.
During the interview, Beatie emphasized: “It’s not a male or female desire to want to have a child; it’s a human desire. I’m a person, and I have the right to have my own biological child.”
His words echoed a powerful assertion of his personal autonomy and challenged conventional perceptions surrounding gender and parenthood.
In 2016, Thomas entered a new chapter, marrying a new partner, Amber. Despite having known each other since 2012, a tumultuous divorce with Nancy delayed Thomas and Amber’s nuptials.
The couple moved to Oregon with their blended family, consisting of Susan, Austin, Jensen, and Amber’s grandchild Lily.
Reflecting on their bustling household, Thomas shared: “It can get pretty loud with four kids aged 3, 5, 6, and 7, but we love it,” in an interview with Daily Mail.
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Quel rôle est plus convaincant: flic ou maçon? ??? Which look is more convincing?
Posted by Thomas Trace Beatie on Sunday, March 10, 2019
Sixteen years have elapsed since Thomas became a public figure, yet he continues to make occasional appearances on social media and in people’s feeds.
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In a recent interview with USA Today, he shared insights into his current endeavors, revealing that he now works as a stockbroker in Phoenix. He continues to live with his wife Amber, whom he met at the daycare where his children were enrolled.
His older children divide their time between his residence and their mother’s home, located approximately ten miles away.
According to Thomas, he lives a relatively quiet life but once in a while, he does public-speaking jobs and takes on modest acting opportunities.
Looking back on the whirlwind of attention that surrounded him 16 years ago when he graced the front pages, Thomas acknowledged the lasting impact of those significant moments in his life.
à quel métier/rôle j’ai l’air? ?️ What profession or role do I look like?
Posted by Thomas Trace Beatie on Tuesday, May 30, 2023
Reflecting on the past, Thomas, now in his 50s, remarked: “When my story came out, there wasn’t a single person in the public eye as a transgender man — most people had never heard of it.”
”This was pre-Chaz Bono. This was pre-Caitlyn Jenner. This was before anyone knew anything. It was a first exposure for a lot of people. And then on top of that, they can give birth! I think exposing the importance of fertility for trans people was a huge eye-opener.”
”Everything was a whirlwind,” he said. ”But I still don’t regret it,” Thomas shared.
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